


Follow You Down

by breathe_out



Category: Marble Hornets
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:21:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22884700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breathe_out/pseuds/breathe_out
Summary: Jay is tired of running - tired of living. He sits in Rosswood in the dead of winter, hoping that the cold will numb him inside and out. Tim pulls him back up to his feet.
Relationships: Jay/Timothy "Tim" W.
Kudos: 69





	Follow You Down

On a freezing morning in the middle of winter, Jay wandered to the forest on nothing but instinct. He walked with his hands stuffed in his jacket until his legs felt like jelly. After a while, he collapsed against a lone tree at the edge of the trail. His surroundings were abnormally serene and still. Snow had fallen overnight and laid a white blanket across the city. He could feel it soaking through his jeans and numbing his skin as he huddled on the ground. The light from the sun could not contest the chilly breeze that played with Jay’s hair. It must have been at least ten degrees – maybe less.

But Jay didn’t mind. He simply closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the gnarled trunk of the tree. Although his body was cold from the assault of the icy wind, he did not move to warm himself. His mind was an enigma of thoughts that refused to disappear. Time had only strengthened his descent into depression. The years had passed at a dizzying pace, since he had watched that very first tape. An incredible sense of loneliness had sunken into his bones until his body felt like a lead. His desperation to live had been replaced with an unhealthy yearning for death. 

The main question pestering his brain was why he should bother continuing on. Although Tim had gradually made the passing time more bearable, a deeper inner darkness still rested at the bottom of his heart. He wanted to hide away until he was dead; tuck himself into a dark hole and never come back out. He wanted to lay down and wait for death to catch up with him. Whether that was Alex, or the Operator, no longer mattered. Jay only wanted it to finally end. No one would ever care about where he went or what happened. His parents were distant memories; his friends were gone. Jay would die and his corpse would lay forgotten for weeks until the bloat made his decaying flesh reek. 

His channel would persist under Tim’s guidance, the world would keep turning on its axis, and he would be gone. Jay reopened his eyes, half expecting that monstrous entity to appear in the distance by his sheer force of will, but the forest was quiet. The occasional call of birds in the trees interrupted the silence. He slumped on the tree, hoping against hope that the wood would swallow him whole. 

Jay’s phone buzzed in his pocket, making him flinch at the sudden noise. Heart pounding in his chest, he maneuvered his numb fingers through his jeans. It took several attempts to properly grasp the device in his unfeeling hands. A single text flashed across the lock screen: Where are you?

Only one other man beside Alex had his number. Guilt surged inside of Jay. He had not considered Tim’s feelings on the matter. He had abandoned their hotel room and left an empty bed behind. Would Tim be mad, or was he just worried? He pursed his lips and tried his best to text back a coherent reply, but his fingers had lost their usual dexterity to the cold. In fact, he was shivering quite violently. 

Fortunately, Tim had the patience of a child. His phone was ringing before Jay could finish writing his reply. He swiped the screen to answer the call. 

“Jay? What the fuck.” Tim was audibly upset, but Jay could swear that a sigh of relief had blown out the speaker for a second.

“S-Sorry. I’m at Rosswood.” His teeth were chattering so badly that it was getting increasingly harder to speak. He swallowed past the lump in his throat. 

“What? Why?” Tim asked, appalled. 

Jay shrugged before he realized that Tim couldn’t see him. Thankfully, Tim pressed on despite his lack of response. “Stay there. I’m coming to you. Where are you?”

“Right o-off the trail.” 

“I’ll be there in a bit. _Don’t move_.” Tim insisted. 

The phone call ended abruptly, leaving Jay a bit dazed. Tim was coming. In his head, Jay calculated the distance between their hotel and the park. It wasn’t too far, as he had walked the entire way in two hours, but Tim would arrive in less than half that time in his car. Thinking of Tim made him feel colder, like he had suddenly stripped his shirt away to bare his torso to the air. He didn’t understand it. He wondered if Tim would miss him if he was gone.

The mere thought of the man was enough to make his breath stutter. They had partnered together nearly a year ago; and although Jay was persistent about doing things on his own, he wasn’t sure he could ever go back to being alone after having someone to talk to for so long. Tim filled a void in him that no one else had been able to thus far. He was a protective, unrelentless force that drove them forward. Jay could not deny that he had grown increasingly closer to him since the day they reunited. Tim was often a man of few words, but Jay had lived with him long enough to catch little details that truly revealed his personality. 

He knew that Tim preferred flannels and worn jeans that were faded near his thighs; he drank caffeinated coffee every morning and smoked more often than he probably should. He was completely headstrong and so stubborn that it made Jay fume at times. He would remind Jay to eat when he was too focused on going through their footage at five in the morning. He tossed and turned in his sleep every single night, mumbling incessantly about hospitals and forests until he eventually tired out. 

The only thing that Jay wasn’t sure about – and perhaps the most important – was if Tim needed him just as much.

After minutes (or hours?) blended together, leaves crunching in the distance startled Jay out of his reverie. His whole body seemed to tense in anticipation. He was unprepared to face whoever – _whatever_ – was coming toward him. Then, Tim’s crimson and black flannel jacket appeared through the branches. The colors looked incredibly bright against the snow. The trail gave way under his heavy boots as he made his way further into the forest. His eyes darted across the tree line until he finally spotted Jay. Tim veered off the path in a brisk job. He had a thick gray blanket hanging over his arm.

“Why in the world are you out here alone?” Tim asked. He looked anxious, upset, and somewhat concerned. 

Jay simply watched him, too caught up in his own head to say anything reasonable. Or maybe his lips had frozen permanently shut. He imagined that he appeared very foolish to Tim. He was trembling against the cold in his thin jacket; his exposed fingers were quickly turning orange and blue with frostbite. The strange hues made his pale skin look mottled and unhealthy. Tim descended on him with the blanket. He unfolded it to wrap the fabric tight around Jay’s shoulders. The sudden warmth made him realize how cold he really was. 

Tim did not withdraw his arm once it was around him. His weight was reassuring as he gripped the blanket in place. Tim tried to ease him up to his feet, but Jay resisted once he realized what he was trying to do. His brain felt sluggish, as if his thoughts were swimming through tar. 

“N-no.” Jay clutched the blanket like a cape. “I can’t.” 

Tim turned visibly annoyed. “You’re being ridiculous.” 

“Just l-leave me here.” He slurred.

“You’ll freeze to death.” Tim growled. They had somehow resulted to fighting one another as Tim pulled and Jay fought to stay down. 

“I w-want to stay.” Jay argued, making his body turn to dead weight in Tim’s arms.

Tim stopped struggling to get him up. Their faces lingered close as their eyes met, breath mingling together in puffs of smoke. Jay averted his gaze from Tim’s startled expression. He leaned further away, until Tim finally had no choice but to release him. He slid back down the tree and landed on his butt with the blanket crumpled around him. 

“What are you saying?” Tim said.

Although Jay’s neck muscles were growing stiff, he still managed to glance at Tim and quickly look away. Tim’s face had hardened into something unreadable. He could feel the other man’s eyes boring a hole through him. Jay stared straight ahead, focusing on a lone tree far on the opposite side of the trail that cut through the forest. He wished that he was alone. 

“I do-don’t want t-to live like t-this anymore.”

Tim’s eyebrows furrowed in anger. “Jay, get up. This place is dangerous.”

Jay shrugged halfheartedly. “I do-don’t care.” 

All his energy seemed to dissipate. He slumped further against the tree with a heavy heart. The back of his eyes felt hot with unshed tears. At that moment, the weight of the entire sky seemed to settle onto his shoulders. He took a deep, shaky breath to try and ease the pain, but it only served to strengthen his sorrow. Nearby, Tim stood over him in silence. Jay half expected him to yell or reach out and hit him. He would have deserved it, either way. 

Instead, Tim sighed and crouched down beside him. Jay watched him carefully, entirely unsure of his intentions. But the worry etched into Tim’s face was genuine and held no trace of judgement or impatience. They simply looked at one another, Jay’s sleep deprived eyes meeting Tim’s softer ones in a slight of open affection. He could get lost in memorizing every single tiny detail of Tim’s face. 

“I care.” Tim whispered, still gazing at him. “You’re not leaving me alone.” 

The way he said it – so concrete and real – left no room for argument. Tim held out his hand, palm up. It hovered between them like an offering. Jay briefly wondered if he could refuse. Although his brain was muddy, he still realized how dire things would be if Tim were on his own. They were partners, after all. They had learned to rely on each other. There wasn’t a single soul in the world that they could trust besides themselves. 

Jay unpeeled his arm from his chest and placed the very tips of his fingers in Tim’s palm. It was warm, solid, firm as it wrapped around him with a tenderness that he had never felt before. Tim rose to his feet and pulled him upward to follow. Jay immediately nearly collapsed back into the snow. The effort to move his legs, let alone stand, was immense. Tim’s arm curled around his waist to steady him. 

“Woah, maybe you should go to the hospital.” Tim said.

Jay shook his head back-and-forth. “No, n-no hospitals. The motel.” The mere thought of strange machines, needles and antiseptic made him nauseous. 

“You have hypothermia.” Tim continued to press.

Jay managed to scoff despite the situation. “N-no m-money.”

Tim opened his mouth to debate the matter, but one look at Jay’s tired eyes seemed to extinguish his resolve. “Fine, but you’re letting me take care of you. No complaining.” 

A small smile graced Jay’s face. “S-s-sounds f-fair.”

Tim’s support was the only thing that kept him upright as they traversed back through the forest. Jay focused on the warmth radiating from Tim’s arms, which were wrapped around him so securely. For the first time, a sense of calm enveloped him. Delicate moments such as these broke the monotony of terror and paranoia that followed them like wolves. And, although Jay’s depression was only at bay for the time, he had never felt so safe with someone else.


End file.
